34 Weeks: On the Count-Down!

Either I've finally acquired thick skin, or perhaps this pregnancy
isn't as prone to emotional melt-down from the commentary of complete
strangers who feel compelled to address me.

I am so thrilled to be only 6 weeks away from my due date because the nesting
urge is setting in, and I can put my hands to work at preparing a special
spot for this babe while my heart dreams of being on the holding side.

Since I was 5 months along, folks have been asking when this baby is due.

My answer generally stirs up a response of surprise, and for the last 3
months I've looked forward to being as close as I've felt all along :-D

Susanna took this picture of me today after we got home from a grocery
shopping expedition.

While waiting for the last of our produce to be bagged, the checker asked
how many children I have.  I told her this is my tenth.  In the course of kind
exclamation, she generously said I didn't look like I could have ten children
(thank you, oh thank you!).

She told me that she had a good friend growing up who was second of fifteen.
The oldest was seventeen when the fifteenth was born - no twins!

Well... wow.

There's always a story to put your own in perspective, eh?

And then while I was loading bags into my vehicle, yet another woman
asked my due date.
"Not until December"  I smiled.

Her eyebrows raised visibly.
"You look like you could pop any time!" she said.


Thanks.  And that's exactly how I feel :-P

New Bump in Town

It's true!
And once again, I'm a little slow in announcing our news.

We expect this little one to arrive around December 10th which puts
Baby at nearly 6 months along (this has been a fast pregnancy for you,
hasn't it!). Not so much for me, though the next three months will
probably be the longest :-D

So far this has been what my midwives call "boringly normal" as they
smile and nod and tell me what a good job I'm doing growing such a sweet
and compliant baby.
I'm so thankful for boringly normal, and while I do have some of the normal-est
kinds of pregnancy maladies, I'm often mindful of how precious this privilege is.

To carry another newly-knit life is a wonder I'll never tire of and one I don't know if I'll
get to experience again or not.  So in the midst of creaky aches and a variety of varicose
veins I choose to cherish the days of being with child.

And absolutely with certainty do I cherish this precious person of mine!

I can't wait to meet you Baby Bug!

May I introduce my Precious Gem?

Friends, this is 

~Emerald Peace~

Born Tuesday evening June 17th

at 7:58pm

Weighing 8 pounds

19 and 3/4" long

Emerald is our delight, 

and my heart aches with the joy of being stretched larger still!

************

As the time of her estimated arrival drew near and the anticipation of labor

put a foreboding taste in my mouth, I found myself clinging to this verse

Zephaniah 3: 17

"The LORD your God in the midst of you is mighty; he will save, 

he will rejoice over you with joy; 

he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."

My labor started in the late afternoon, slow and with no pattern.

At 5-ish on that cool and very rainy evening we packed the kids off to Auntie Hannah 

(who gave them a slumber party to remember for years to come!)

and the house became still and quiet.

Through contractions I stirred with the final details for a cozy birthing. 

Midwives were on their way, house tidy, two baby bundles with bows (one for girl, one for boy)

sat carefully arranged on top of extra towels and blankets.

Standing back in the softly lit  living room with candle flickering in the corner

I surveyed the arrangement and felt ready.

The atmosphere was peaceful, my beloved opted to let the midwives deliver this baby

and so was right beside me, a comfort and presence.

I had intended to meditate on the larger part of Zephaniah 3:10, 

knowing that the Lord God, He rejoices over me!

He sings for me.

He quiets me.

Instead, with each labor pain I breathed only "...He will quiet you with his love..."

and knew it true.

With long restful breaks between contractions it wasn't long before she came.

Gently she came

and the peaceful calm was broken by a tiny but rather indignant squall.

She was born in the caul; "that means good luck" they told us.

I don't know about luck, 

but our home has a brand new blessing in the addition of sweet Emerald Peace.  

I'm certain we are the privileged to know her and to be the ones

holding and loving her.

{About 3 hours old}

{A little sister for Aloria}

{5 days old}

~Favorite~

I've had four fabulous hospital births with one amazing midwife
in California, followed by four home-births in four different homes
in three different States with four different sets of midwives.
(No one has been born in the car yet and we consider that
a good record to keep!)

Since we just arrived back home to North Idaho, this baby had
his first introduction to our attending midwife.
Until this week, I had forgotten my favorite part about midwife visits.

When I lay on the bed and eagerly wait to hear that tiny heart I know
is beating, the woman providing care for we two places hands on belly
and feels the position of the baby - favorite part: hearing her speak to
my own precious person as a precious person.
"Well hello there baby!"  and when there's a reply from inside bearing
resemblance to a jump or kick "Good job Kiddo!"  as well as other
soft words spoken directly to my person.

My person.

Recognized as such by another human 
and cherished as a living being.

That's my favorite part about midwife visits.

(My favorite part about being pregnant, is when I get to the end of this 
race and get to MEET my person!)   

For Someone Very Special...

Yes it's true.

Two months left until I meet one of my favorite people ever!

With the winter months indoors and desire to dream, this quilt grew
quickly and was relieved to be completely finished with plenty of time
to spare.

I loved every minute of cutting, piecing, and stitching.  Such gentle, methodical
work for the hands while the mind and heart swell with thoughts, ideas, plans...

And mulling over a couple lovely names until they become a possibility for this wee
ones own unique personality, makes the days slow (rather than rush by) as I
get more and more eager to know who he or she is.

It has been a quiet season here - both at home and in spirit (as well as in blog :-)),
but in a matter of days the quiet turns to din as we prepare for the Idaho trek
homeward and look forward to a full Summer of house projects, Spring cleaning,
welcoming a baby, and many romps in the forest and lake.  For me, I hope this
means sitting with a snuggled Tiny Bit and putting my feet up - if I'm lucky, an icy
drink will be within reach and someones interesting story to listen to.
I think it's likely :-)

That kind of fullness of day will be a pleasant exchange for the quiet ones now
coming to a close.

I welcome it all.

Everything I Hoped and Dreamed....

In answer to the prayers of many
and many prayers of mine,

we were honored to welcome another precious little person
to our family on Sunday night!

Miles Favor really surprised us with his hefty size, weighing 10 pounds, 2 ounces!!
Whew!  But worth every effort :-)

I will write more shortly, but honestly I can't find the words right now to express my joy,
my amazement, my thankfulness, and all the feelings that fill my heart as I reflect on God's
favor on my life; extending to each member of my family and now sweet Miles.

Thank you again precious friends, for your kind words and prayers.
I couldn't wait to share my news with YOU!

One very overjoyed,

~Momma Bug

To You

Dearest Friends,

You ladies bless my socks off!
Your kind, gentle, encouraging words breath life into my spirit and refresh me for the
upcoming work ahead.  Thank you for praying for me, and for taking the time to
comment!  To read each one is like opening a package - I kind of savor the sweetness :-)

It's official this week, baby can come and be exactly on time!
According to history I would expect he or she to appear from several days early to
one day late.  According to reality, this labor isn't obligated to take note of prior patterns.
As for me, there has been a change in the last few days.  Baby is lower and scrapes bottom
(if you know what I mean), more Braxton Hicks contractions, I'm moving slower over all,
and then the occasional "I can't do this" cry overtakes me at night in anticipation.
Yup.  It's time.

The verse that has implanted itself on my heart this time is 1 John 4:18

"...but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment..."

Boy do I know this truth!  I know that fear causes torment, and I can do nothing
about the future or the unknown that lies ahead.  I can only take one moment at
a time as it arrives.
I know that God is Love.  HE is the one who drives out fear, and for me he
has been doing just that.  Every time I get an inkling to be anxious about upcoming
labor (which, no matter how great my experiences have been, childbirth hurts
and I remember it well.) I'm choosing to give my fears to the One Perfect Love.
He has been faithful, and I'm counting on Him to be my strength in the very
moments I need Him.


In other news, I really should blog a pile of pictures from our daily goings-on
here.  The children have been enjoying the new birds, and creating some really neat
things in the wood shop, and drawing up a storm!  Perhaps that is the next post.
Grandma's would appreciate that probably :-)

Snow again this afternoon, after a day in the 70's yesterday luring me out in my
bare feet.  I like the gray for hunkering down in my cozy bedroom.  This is where
I've been doing much of our school reading together, and this afternoon I've
hibernated here while dishing out instructions to Zachary on how to make salsa
for dinner, and giving instructions to Susanna for washing the lettuce and grating
the cheese.
I broke open the name book for the first time ever - just reevaluating names for
this baby - and spent some time with hot cocoa and books and inspiration for
new artwork I want to start in on.
It was a lovely afternoon.  Now time to check messes and tidy up before dad
gets home.  To rally the troops and wrap up loose ends.  To close up the lap top
and live the evening :-)

Thanks again friends - each dear one - for reaching out to me.
I am blessed.

Nested and Waiting

Can't remember if I shared a picture of this quilt I made for Baby.

It's been ready and waiting for the past few months, and its colorful rainbow
stripes make me smile and think of this special little person when I look at it.

Life gets a little more hectic with each addition which is why it feels important
for me to acknowledge each precious new life.  There is not the same kind of
waiting for an eighth child as there is for a first.
Not that an eighth baby is less appreciated, just more eclipsed by daily life.
In fact, I'd say there's greater expectancy and eager anticipation in our household
because of the excitement generated by 7 big brothers and sisters!

Anyway, this bunny is the softest, most floppy and wonderful stuffed animal
I remember ever meeting!  It was my sole purchase on recent introduction to
a local Anthropology store (I'm hooked!).
Adding a bow and perching him on top of the colorful pile completed my
New Baby stash with panache :-)

Baby, I hope you know how much I love you!

I'd say the sewing projects have come to a rest.  I've still been chipping away
at some art projects I started a while back, and am continuing to make our
bedroom a comfortable retreat.  Fluffing feathers here and there, you know.

Here is a smattering of the things I've completed for my own babe as
well as a few for his or her newly arrived friends.

It must be winter. Ha!  Look at all the COLOR!






















I want to thank the Lord for the sweetness of sleep.  I don't remember the last time in 12 years
that I was getting over 8 hours of sleep every night, and that's what I'm getting right now.
I really thought it would be short-lived and that I was due at least a few weeks of being miserable
at night with grinding joints and the endless rolling-over process, not to mention regular
midnight treks to the bathroom.
Not so.

I'd like to credit the sporadic efforts at my T-Tapp workout in the last 8 months on and
off for lack of discomfort in certain regions, and I'd like to credit my easy temper
and lack of basket-case-ness to the increased sleep, but...

The truth is, I have no idea why I'm being blessed with such a peaceful, calm pregnancy.

All I can say is wow.  Thank you again Lord!  It is You and only You that covers me with
your hand of favor and sweet blessing!  
Glory is His alone.

Today I'm 39 weeks.
I have everything I need for this new baby, including some frivolous items I'm sure we
don't need but are fun to have :-)  There is a good little snow storm blowing in fresh
white drifts tonight, and with a pantry and fridge well stocked I feel ready to hunker
down and dream of soon.
Baby-Coming soon.
It may be another week or two; it could be tonight.  I'm content.  Ready.  Eager.

Wanting Oh-so-much to be holding this baby in my arms instead of the pod-like
compartment which is fast running out of space.

Soon would be fine with me :-)

Nesting... and trying to shake the bug.

furious frenzy of nest-feathering has overtaken this home! My friend Jana (who is nesting and awaiting the arrival of her little one in our guest accommodations) and I are due three weeks apart. It has been novel to nest without diving into sorting and cleaning projects, but this house is new to us, and so little furnished in all the cracks and crevices, that we can start fresh on any project we want without having to backtrack!

 Jana has been handy with crochet needle, and I have set up sewing operations in the master bathroom (yes, master bathroom) because 1. it's plenty large enough, and 2. I've been letting small children swim and play in the huge tub in order to ease the sicky blues. In camping out with my sewing machine I can make sure no one drowns :-D

I always love a good surprise ending to my pregnancy story, and prefer not to find out gender ahead of time. Amazingly, my Beloved and I agreed on names early on (when does that ever happen?!) and now I have only to create every loving detail in two color schemes.
There's no shortage of gender-neutral out there, but I find I never use it once baby is met and known.
On top of my own baby trousseau, I am trying to sneak in a couple things for another wee nephew and
one or two tiny friends due to arrive in close proximity.  Some rooms in the house resemble the elves
workshop :-)

This is the Girl baby blanket I sewed up recently.  I still have a darling Boy blanket which didn't get used
last time because we had an Aloria.  I wonder which one will be used this time around?

It was my first time using minky fabric and it looks like I could use some practice,
but I'm pretty sure baby won't mind my puckers and goofs.  It is bright, cheerful,
and very much "me", that fabric!  I couldn't help thinking of my mom too, because
I think this is a print she'd give a high approval rating to :-)

In other news, our illness prevails.  Thankfully we have no plans this week and can
lay low.  I read to the kids this morning, but my voice is pretty weak because of the
cough I've had.  Reading isn't ideal.  Poor Aloria-girl woke with a fresh bout of
sickness this morning, and she was the first it hit at the beginning of the week.
With a fever, runny nose and miserable cough, she wanted only to be held all day.
Though everyone has been trouping along with admirable endurance, by this evening
I felt ready to be done being sick.
All of December we were knocked out, and this round has me discouraged.

Thanks Lord for all the bright colors in fabric, the sunshine most days, the snow
flurries today, friends who make dinner, children who are my hands and feet
when mine are taken up with sick babies...
Thanks Lord, for hot baths, and more hot baths :-)  Yes, for all the hot baths a person
could dream of.
Thanks for a husband near-by, and for music to listen to, and a potty-trained little boy,
and plenty of books,  and for fresh fruit because we're really going through the fruit!

I'm loving the freedom and resources to create; loathing all the fevers, flushed faces,
and germs flying to and fro; and in my tired-of-being-sick state, I have an awful lot
to be thankful for.

Sometimes, they call me Mother

Sickness has entered the house for round two.

My heart is thankful to be sick on a weekend, when I can release myself of guilt for the things I'm supposed to be doing (ie. conducting lessons and keeping small people productively entertained).  As it is, I let my hair down and run movies full tilt.  As long as everyone is content and the ones needing to rest are being still, I think it's a good move.  

Achy joints, fevers, barky coughs,

Long hot baths, tea, pillows strewn about the living room...  that's what life is this weekend.

I'm so glad it's not the throw-ups.

Tears come easily (to me) in this third trimester.  Only five weeks to go, and I can hardly wait to meet this wiggling little person!  The most precious thing about the tears this time around, is that I don't find myself attaching them to anything - any event or catastrophe.

I happen to know from 7 times prior experience that this hormonal weepiness rarely has a reason, but usually I try to pin it on something.   There has to be an explanation besides hormones, doesn't there?

The other night though, I had a good cleansing cry after I dropped my Beloved off at the airport.  All I could think was "Thanks Lord, for letting me cry without any reason at all.  Everything is well and blessed, and I  am an 8 months pregnant woman who just needs a good cry. Thank you."

 The other day I was sitting in swim lessons watching my children splash away, and couldn't help myself from doing a bit of people watching.  It's a favorite pass-time of mine, and offers much perspective on life for one willing to take up consideration.

One thing that struck me, was the sweetness of the young mothers in that place.  Most of the mamas were watching one or two children swim while cuddling a toddler or baby.  Most of them had three children at most.  Most of them were probably my age in their 30's.
I know that lots of women wish for more children, but I think it's more likely that status quo dictates the social standard for most people in general.  But without digressing into personal territory, I just want to say how much pleasure I got from watching these mothers... mother.  These unknown ladies blessed me in their tender efforts, and if anyone can appreciate the effort that effort takes - I think I can :-)

I was affected in another way too though - I was overwhelmed with gratefulness for this season being so long for me.  Specifically the baby/toddler/ little person season.  I was almost sick to think that the third child sitting on mommas lap being read to, was the last two-year-old that momma would have the pleasure of holding close in that way.  Oh how thankful I am to have so many chances to do-over some of those moments I missed the first, second, third time around.  I am enjoying my coming-up young adults so very much, but I am glad this toddler cuddling season isn't over.
I couldn't help think that if that momma were me, my youngest could be 6 or 8 years old!  Instead, I am reveling in those ages while looking forward once more to the second my labors are rewarded and I'm handed a warm, wet, bundle to love.
And another chance to try again - to do-over things that want perfecting, and to become a sweeter momma in the process.

These children of mine - they are priceless.  In the midst of juggling daily life I sometimes take them a bit for granted.  They amaze me. They inspire me.  They are becoming such fascinating and vibrant personalities!
And I get to be their mom.

One of mine own calls me Mother.
And unlike the mom who tacks on a middle name as voice and irritation mount, this girl utters the word as an endearment.  Whenever I hear it I feel it's an honor I don't deserve - this title of Mother.
Mom seems to me the sum of all my parts.  My failures included, but Mother... that is the bare truth of who I am.  I am a mother.  I am her mother.  For all time... mother.

The funny thing is that it has caught.  I now have a three-year-old little boy calling me: "Mother... could you get me a drink?"  And a lisping 21 month snippet of sunshine in pigtails who chirps "Mah-er... Mah-er".

So bring on the tears - those ridiculous, annoying, hormonal pregnancy tears.  I am the luckiest woman on earth!  I am the momma to each one of these spectacular individuals.  They give me grace in my failures.  They encourage me when I'm fumbling and bumbling.  They are still cuddle-able.
Even though I am mom, and often deserving of much less than the mountains of love they heap back into my life...

Sometimes... they call me Mother.

Were it so simple.

This pregnancy has been another "boringly normal" one.
One thing considerably notable is how much of a mover this little person is.
Moving-moving all the time!
I have been sleeping great lately, but I admit I am ready to meet
he or she and cuddle some sweet baby skin up next to my cheek.

I must look ready.  I keep getting asked "how much longer" I have.
When I answer two months, eyebrows shoot up.
Today when I was grilled, I was told for the second time that I
"look ready to pop"

What do you say to that.

?

Thankfully I am not feeling especially sensitive or vulnerable this time
around, so I tend to take these commentaries in stride.  Smiling, I answer
that "I feel ready to pop".

((And were it so simple to get a baby out as "popping"))

Usually, strangers who like to yak about my pregnant state also want to know 
if this is my first.

"Nooo...." I say slowly "I have some others."

Often this is not the end of our conversation, even as I have signed my receipt
and am trying to edge toward a door.
But I'm selective about who I tell just how many "some more" adds up to.

It can be fun to see the reactions, but it can also put people on the spot.

All in all, I can't believe how many positive looks, responses, and comments
I get when I take the crew out with me.

The Lord's favor is richly over my daily life in that way.
All glory to Him!

Today I had one more really fun commentary - a first for me actually......

The nine of us (including my Wiggly Bump) were taking up half a grocery
store isle, and I was intently instructing Bryce which Bagels to retrieve
for me.
"The Blueberry ones there, with the blue label." I pointed my finger.

There was a woman and child appearing to wait until it was safe to pass
us without running over one of my hoodlums. Or three.

They didn't pass.

The woman continued to observe us, and I began to
realize she was enjoying herself immensely. We were putting on a show.

When she finally did pass, she said "You have a BIG family!"

"Comparatively speaking we have" I replied

Then she asked:
"Are you that family on TV?"

Harhar! {I chuckled out loud}

"NOOO!" I said,
"But when we come out like this it FEELS like we're on TV!"

((At least it feels like we're being watched.))

Ain't that the truth though?  Do YOU feel like you're on TV?
Even going out with just two or three little ones can put you in the limelight.

Hmm... I wonder what the next stranger will say to beat that one!

Such good times.

Masks that Lina made for herself and Bryce

Swapping Sunglasses and checking out their bad selves in the mirror

Painting in the sunlight

Explaining a Math problem (who's doing the explaining though?)

Blocks and animal cutouts the boys have been making

Such great form - and at such an early age! :-)

Soaring with the Snowflakes!

 I took this opportunity to snap a few pictures of my Bugletts in the wintry white.  

We've only had a couple light snows so far, and not when we could go out and play in it.  

Lately it's warmed up enough to melt off,

so we're glad we took a few minutes on this day to soar in the drifting flakes 

and to examine their beauty close up!

 

 

 

 Here I am.  Baby is now 24 weeks along.  

In so many ways pregnancy sails by in the business of living, but it also seems like March 

is a very long way away! Thanks to the Lord, I have had another non-eventful pregnancy

that's been as easy as pregnancy ever is :-)  I feel very blessed and content - eager to actually

hold this one, but content until then.

We're enjoying the beginning of holiday seasons~

I hope your homes is full of light and life too!

He knows the stars by name...

That is a thought too grand for me to comprehend.

He knows the beautiful stars, he places them in their places and calls them by name - each one.
I love Him so.

Sometimes it seems my life was fashioned by God purely for the experiment of outpouring
His favor in large quantities and in new creative ways on one very low person... for what purpose?
I have no idea. I'm completely blank when it comes to the question, but it's a true truth that
I am the recipient of such amazing grace. 

Today I proclaim His mercies again.

To begin, I must announce the marvel of a new baby to arrive in March!  

Until recently, all has been boringly normal with this pregnancy.
Last night, through three isolated events over the course of several hours
I believed I was losing my baby.  Everything pointed to a miscarriage and I had only to
await the cramping.
I admit, I was a bit fearful.  At nearly 15 weeks gestation I'd never lost a baby so far along.
Last night was a restless time.
AJ was due to fly across country this morning (which he ended up proceeding with), and we've
been hosting dear friends from Oregon who are not due to leave for a few days yet.  I won't
record them by number, but I had not a few questions about the unknown future.

Last night I called two dear women, friends of mine experienced in pregnancy and delivering babies,
and each of them were available to talk with.  Both offering assurances of hope which I had not expected
to hear.
Then I emailed my local midwife whom I haven't talked to since my last baby was born.
She is only in office two days a week and today being one of them I wanted to see if she'd listen for
a tiny heartbeat.  This morning she promptly replied and scheduled in into her already packed day,
but by this morning I determined that an ultrasound was probably inevitable whether we heard a
heartbeat or not.
Feeling quite well this morning and full of hope since I wasn't continuing to bleed and hadn't
experienced any cramping, I saw my husband out the door to the airport and wondered how I was
going to cope through this day with 7 children and 5 guests.

The Lord knew.  And He provided what I needed each moment - namely peace for the unknown.

After I lay 5 children down for nap I checked email one more time before I too, intended to shut eye
for an hour or so.
There was a hurried note from my midwife saying she'd scheduled me for an ultrasound at the
hospital 1 hour from the time I read my email - just barely enough time to load my crew and drive
the 45 minutes to the hospital!  Wow. 
My visiting (and very precious) friend Sarah rode with me to sit with my children in the van, the rest
of her own family followed behind offering the support of their presence.  That so put my mind at ease
and strengthened my courage for the unforeseen ahead.

I could not believe the timing of each call, letter, appointment, person available, and event
which made up the course of this day.  I was told that the small-town ultrasound technician wouldn't
be available again until late in the week, and yet an appointment right now?  Wow again.

Even on the drive to the ultrasound appointment I couldn't help but know I had experienced the love
of God in orchestrating these details so carefully - no matter the outcome.  I felt cherished.

Skipping ahead to the good part, 
the amazing technology of ultrasound imaging showed to me 
the most beautiful and perfect baby I could have dreamed up!

And there was a tiny beating heart.

There was a small round head, and two little arms waving at me, two legs tucked up near a sweet
little tummy... all screaming "life life LIFE!"
There was nothing else to do but marvel and worship.  Without making this post more about me
than I intended, I need add I do not deserve this, didn't expect this, didn't earn this.
It's all a mysterious piece of that experiment - His favor poured out on me!
Thank you Lord.


And I rejoice.

Thanks for rejoicing together with me :-)

Soaking it all in

It's not that I am so organized, or diligent, or amazing.
I get these recent pictures and posts up for two reasons:
1) For the grandma's and aunties and all the family far from us in body.
2) Because AJ and the children are running the home so I can rest.

Which is what I've been doing.  Rest is good.  Aloria is pretty good at it too:-)
She's been nothing but a pleasure.  Well, that and a wonder.
Each of my other children too, as I see them rise to new challenges and embrace things that are hard
or not fun (such as doing the necessary chores to keep things afloat).
Zachary has been cooking for us.  He even made a grocery list and Dad took the 6 big kids shopping
(everyone knows that grocery shopping with dad is FUN!  It's a whole different ball game.).
Here's last night's dinner of fajitas - well done my son!

Tonight he made hamburgers and green jello and took them up the hill to share with cousins.

The Bugletts climb up on the bed all through the day to cuddle and read, and admire sister.
It's been delightful to see their love and devotion to her already.

I am soaking in every moment with Aloria in these first few days.  I love it.
There have been the usual hormones and pains that go with the package,
but these are the memories to savor.  They are the ones I want to keep with me always:-)