Friday, December 11, 2009

Subtle












That's what I am.

I'm a girl who likes surprises, but I have a husband who isn't a surprise kind of guy.
He will buy me anything I want without a blink (and I'm not complaining about that), but I have learned that it's better to be specific and know what's coming, than to hope, wait, and be dissapointed.

You know that red mug I received a few days ago?

That's a good example of what I'm talking about here.
I thought to myself "how can I get AJ to buy that mug for me (because it's a lot less romantic to purchase it for myself and tell him he bought it)"

This is what I came up with.

Me: "Hey Honey! You know that blue mug I gave you for your birthday? I had decided that if they ever made one in red, I'd get it - and guess what? They have it in RED now!"

He: "Did you buy it?"

Me: "Nah. Haven't got around to it yet"

And that's about as subtle as I get these days, but look how it worked out for me!

Now. This hat.

Another early, unwrapped, Christmas present.
We had been shopping at REI and I fell for this hat, but couldn't justify it.
Fast forward a day --->

Me to He:
"You know that hat I showed you?
I think I need it.
I really don't have a nice warm fleece lined hat for the cold.
We do live in Colorado and Northern Idaho now...
Yep.
You can get that for me if you want."
(wink wink grin)

And it worked as you can see.

So I am learning his language and he mine.
I don't hint so much as I did twelve years ago...

And he occasionally surprises me! ;-)

Do YOU like surprises?

14 comments:

J said...

Hmmm. Yes. Same here at my house. I have been "subtle" lately in your same way...and sometimes have to still be careful b/c then a certain someone might become a little offended that he feels like I have to tell him b/c he doesn't know what I want, or that he doesn't know me... But he doesn't know what I want. And how would he unless I told him? Very tricky my dear. Very cute hat. :)

Momma Bug said...

And what DO you want Mrs. J.S.?

Pam said...

LOL! Don't. I don't like em. Not at all. Surprises get all hyped up when spoken of, and then, boom. There it is and....

Example. My mom wrapped me the most beautiful present one day. Never saw such a pretty package. I was so excited. I opened it with extreme wonderment.

A pair of red socks! Did I mention I don't care for red?

My husband and I were dating. All about the store we both worked in our fellow workers were abuzz with what he got me. Someone mentioned a box. Someone mentioned maybe gold. I was pumped! He was going to ask me to MARRY HIM!
He took me to a fancy restaurant and pulled out the little box. I opened it with tears forming...a watch.

See. Surprises can be not so good!
Ps. nice hat.

gramsie said...

What is that wonderful saying? Ah yes...."the apple don't fall far from the tree"...I have come to appreciate non-surprises too :o)

Grace McHugh said...

Surprises are too stressful for me because I am hard to surprise. However..... I LOVE surprising people because........well........because I am very good at it. I am seldom surprised because I typically figure it out. So my man has learned to ask for ideas and then he goes from there. Everyone is much happier.

J said...

ha ha ha Grace I am cracking up. "Because, well I am very good at it!"

Love the proposal story...I thought B was going to propose too, it was coming so I was ready...and I thought it was it, I opened it and it was a blue vase I had seen and liked a few weeks prior...I loathe that vase to this day! Never have I been less appreciative for a thoughtful gift! ha So yeah, surprises can be not so good.

In high school my friends threw me a surprise bday party and I cried and spent an hour in the bathroom.

So I guess the answer is , I like surprises if they are something I want or am hoping for! ha ha

And Analene, another sneaky way to be "subtle" is to tell the children what you want so they can pass it along...that seems to be working well for now!

Momma Bug said...

I must be dense.
Why haven't I thought of that before?

On the upside, I have at least one child who is an awesome gift giver, remembering and planning for a special occasion weeks in advance, and keeps a secret!
I can roll with that. It was worth the wait!

princessmama said...

Cute hat! :)

Hmmm, surprises would be a sometimes for me. You see, my guy loves surprises. To him the "act of service" in preparing a surprise is more important than the actual gift. I have learned this about him and from early on have endeavored to surprise him once in a while.

Me on the other hand, would much rather have what I *asked* for than be surprised. What I have learned to appreciate is all the work my man goes to to procure the surprise, be it a gift or an outing whatever.

He is learning (slowly!! LOL) that to me getting what I was hoping for is the important thing.

:)

Holly Days Closet said...

You have a very smart hubby. :)
Holly

Jess said...

Aw I love that hat! I don't like surprises, I like to get exactly what I want. Beloved likes getting me surprises and doesn't like it when I exchange them for exactly what I want ;) Growth happens here! I want placemats for the table that I can wipe down and fingers crossed I get them!

Jess said...

Oh and I found out that a surprise party for me was narrowly averted recently. The word relief doesn't come close! I have already told Beloved that if he ever throws me one, I won't be attending. The well meaning relative didn't get the memo!

Shauna said...

Oh 'Lene, one of my favorite parts of marriage, learning to communicate in the same language! I have learned that subtlty does not behoove me when it comes to trying to let Karl in on something, but giving a specific - great plan!
That telling the children so they can tell Daddy is a great plan too. At least I recall it worked well for my mom. I learned to be prepared every time a birthday or Christmas was approaching as I could be certain Daddy would be asking soon!

Carrie's Blog said...

Love the hat!!! Surprises, I like them from my husband, but not many others. My man always gets me something wonderful, no matter the occasion. He impresses me. Along the lines of Jenny...tell the children...or as he does....take them shopping with him.

2homeschool said...

:-)

Love it!

And love the hat.