Well you thought I was back....
but I'm not. (not exactly, fully, and completely back.)
It's not that I'm too worn out from the weekend company.
It's not that I have nothing to blog about.
There are a number of things that "it's not".
While today went well and had some delightfully fun moments,
tonight at quarter to eleven I am in a slump of defeat.
I think it's more of an emotional thing, and very likely there is a spiritual battle taking place.
I don't know how much schedule to conform to.
I don't know how lax to be.
I can't figure out when to train,
and when to toss all care to the wind.
I don't know how to fit "it" all in.
"It" is just TOO MUCH!
There is house up-keep,
meals,
baths,
shopping,
school,
play,
things to get done for my dear husband.
I think I need some sleep.. .
blessed sleep!
That might make everything look brighter...
If only I drank coffee coffee...
...maybe I should start :-}
Common, tell me again...
It's not by my might or by my power, but only by the super-natural power of the Holy Spirit who indwells me (ME, adopted as a daughter of God and loved by HIM!) that I can do any of that "it"!!
I am washed perfectly and spotlessly clean by my Jesus's blood.
Do you know? HE SEES ME AS PERFECT!
There is no defeat - the battle is already won. I and my Lord are the victors!
Arise!
Worship HIM!
Count not what man values, but will to look for an eternal reward.
(I'm giving myself a pep-talk here)
I'm going to be okay now,
And if I can get to dry land, I'll post something more up-beat ;-)
5 comments:
The verse "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" comes to mind.
I look up to you Analene, for your faith and all you do as a mom. It's hardwork...I can only imagine. Be encouraged...You are doing a great job.
Praying for you sweet friend.
It is crazy to me that I got on here thinking the same verse as Diane... His power is made perfect in our Weakness...I was thinking about that... I will email you as soon as I can find it just so you have it sis. There is this thing I once read (it was also one of the first things that I read for fun to Nick when we first met/were hanging out. It goes into a cool picture to me of what that verse is really saying... Any way...for now Thanks Diane for encouraging my sis and I agree with Diane sis. We must have these time to remember His blessed faithfulness and strength in times of weakness. I look up to you also of course...lol I mean, you ARE my big sister. But even more then that, you are a woman that seeks Gods heart, and I have always loved that gentle spirit of yours that God gave you. I love you sis. i will be praying for you now...
Thank YOU for YOUR prayers this week...It has been a hard month, but Nick and I are grateful for one another that much more.
Dear Girls,
Thank you.
I'm trying to remember the context of that verse. Please drop another line if you think of it - I could use it up in front of me these days:-)
I'm not worthy to be looked up to, but if you see any of the Lord's rich mercy leaking out from the cracks of my life, give Him glory, and realize that HE IS REAL!
Last night he reminded me
"My blood is all that matters Analene."
I took that to mean that it's more important to convey the reality of God, His love, and redemption to my children, than to conform to any flesh-imposed standard.
Even if my children KNOW that God is real, and they cannot see evidence of peace and joy in my own life, what will there be in Christianity to attract them?
I don't want to send a message of works winning favor with a stern, unhappy God!
No-siree!
So keep praying for me. By God's grace, He will reveal the path I must walk in by faith (and in practicality), one step at a time.
I am curious...
Have you scheduled time for training?
Is there a particular time of day you struggle?
Are there things that the children can do that would take projects off of you? For example, feed one of the babies while you eat. Teach one of the younger ones their ABC's. Read to the younger children?
Are you getting fed spiritually? Sounds like it (your next blog).
God is gracious. He is also merciful. Feel free to cry for mercy. Or just to cry. That sometimes helps.
I love you.
~H
Analene,
I don't have your email, so I am posting you a HUGE comment, but here is the context of the verse.
Love and praying for you!
2 Corinthians 12 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society
2 Corinthians 12
Paul's Vision and His Thorn
1I must go on boasting. Although there is nothing to be gained, I will go on to visions and revelations from the Lord. 2I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago was caught up to the third heaven. Whether it was in the body or out of the body I do not know—God knows. 3And I know that this man—whether in the body or apart from the body I do not know, but God knows— 4was caught up to paradise. He heard inexpressible things, things that man is not permitted to tell. 5I will boast about a man like that, but I will not boast about myself, except about my weaknesses. 6Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than is warranted by what I do or say.
7To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Paul's Concern for the Corinthians
11I have made a fool of myself, but you drove me to it. I ought to have been commended by you, for I am not in the least inferior to the "super-apostles," even though I am nothing. 12The things that mark an apostle—signs, wonders and miracles—were done among you with great perseverance. 13How were you inferior to the other churches, except that I was never a burden to you? Forgive me this wrong!
14Now I am ready to visit you for the third time, and I will not be a burden to you, because what I want is not your possessions but you. After all, children should not have to save up for their parents, but parents for their children. 15So I will very gladly spend for you everything I have and expend myself as well. If I love you more, will you love me less? 16Be that as it may, I have not been a burden to you. Yet, crafty fellow that I am, I caught you by trickery! 17Did I exploit you through any of the men I sent you? 18I urged Titus to go to you and I sent our brother with him. Titus did not exploit you, did he? Did we not act in the same spirit and follow the same course?
19Have you been thinking all along that we have been defending ourselves to you? We have been speaking in the sight of God as those in Christ; and everything we do, dear friends, is for your strengthening. 20For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, factions, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder. 21I am afraid that when I come again my God will humble me before you, and I will be grieved over many who have sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual sin and debauchery in which they have indulged.
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