Monday, April 27, 2009

Little Victories

I had a brainstorm last night.
I have been thinking how much I'd like to do a better job being my children's friend. I want to let them participate more in what I'm working on - be it dinner, sewing, or making the bed (which at this innocent, unbiased age they still ASK to help with). I am just so often tired. The job is faster completed without "help" and I aways graciously offer to let them watch... Humph. They don't want to watch, they want to HELP! And I know I should let them. AND I know I will regret it one day if I don't.
The thing is I have not been able to bring about all the change as fast and efficiently as I want to see it. More often than not I fail so miserably that my quiet evening hours are filled with regret (somewhat due to pregnancy hormones) and as my guilt grows, my resolve weakens.

So... that brings me to my brainstorm.
I am going to start posting little victories. As often as they occur or I want to record them I am going to post the thing I did with my child/children that went against my flesh, but I did because I knew it was best. Something I did because it was the right thing to do when I may not have felt like doing it.
For instance, today: While I was getting breakfast on this morning, Susanna asked if she could help, so I pulled over a stool and let her stir the scrambled eggs on the stove.
Then she scooped the blueberries into each bowl of oatmeal and squeezed the agave nectar over the top.
My goodness how she glowed at the breakfast table!

"...Yes, mom did let me have a blueberry already, but I was one of the cooks, and the cooks get to have tastes..."
"Mom and I have the biggest bowls because the cooks get to have the biggest bowls if they want..."

That was one of my little victories today - letting Sue help me.
When I made a quick trip to the dryer to take out a few clothes, I took Olivia with me and she did the job for me while I gathered clothes out of the washer.
Another little victory.
I know these are the things I am supposed to be doing all the time and throughout the day, but this one area is a real weak area in my life and daily routine. Rather than trying to "eat the elephant" all in one bite, I am going to take a forkful here and a spoonful there and a sliver after that as I can.

If you are inspired to attempt this challenge too, leave me a comment on my Little Victories posts and we can enjoy each other's exploits and glorify the Lord together!


princessmama said...

Little victories are often the best victories! They add up over time and become habits. And little victories turn to big TRIUMPH! Good job Momma Bug:)

I'll definitly join you ;)

My biggest regret right now is how often I send the boys off to entertain themselves so my foggy brain doesn't have to come up with a fun/learning activity we can do together. It could be as simple as a nature walk or a phonics game. My goal will be to do one thing a day to start with.

Tally-ho! lol

Photo Momma said...

I have started doing this with Caleb. He is only 2 but we figure that we have to start somewhere! And you are right, it will be much better to try now while they still ask to help :) Caleb helps with getting the laundry out of the dryer and he folds washclothes (sometimes). He "helps" rinse dishes. It is a challenge for me as well because it slows me down and I don't have enough time as it is! I am anxious to reap the rewards of this early training though... hopefully someday soon. :)

jenny said...

little shmittle! those are BIG in our kind of worlds! just think, enough training now and in a few years they'll be cooking the whole meal and not wanting US to help! hee hee hee

Grace McHugh said...

Emily and I made a no sew fleece blanket tonight.........boy was it late, but I allowed her to do almost all of the tying. Very tedious and slow but she is so very proud that "momma helped" while Emily got to do most of the work. :) You are doing great. Any small to you is very big to your child.

Momma Bug said...

Grace! How delightful! That's like what she did for Rory's Christmas gift right? Who's this one for? I hope you post pictures!

Jenny, Thank you. You are right, of course:-)

Sarah and Rebekah, so true. It is hard work. I have reaped such good fruit from the little training I have done. I was easier with the first - even when there was two, but It's harder to do with the little ones today.
My bigger ones are getting to be a REAL help when I had things over to them. I need to do that more too, because they are so proud to be a necessary part of the family (and they ARE!), and they get into the habbit of helping mom instead of it being such an imposition when I ask.

I am excited though. One day at a time, one little victory at a time I think I might be able to do. Then I can at least look at that one little thing at the end of the day instead of feel overwhelmed by the twenty I didn't do.

Baby steps right?

Mommy Reg said...

Hurray for you! I am excited that you are making the effort and reveling in the small victories.
Little G is responsible for putting the clothes in the dryer and pushing the button to make it start. She loves that job, and all of the kids have had it at that age.
Eventually you will just have the mindset to have the kids doing stuff with you all the time. It helps to lower your standards. Do not expect perfection. It will be perfect in their eyes and you will be focusing on the eternal (Your relationship with them.) not the temporary. (Like a perfectly made bed.)

Diane said...

Such a good job Analene. I'm making mental notes for my future! Love you.

Jess said...

Yay you!!! What a great idea

Jess said...

Am now on board with this post:

Lauren said...

:D Our little guy's just 6 months old, and our little peanut isn't arriving until November, but I know that's something I'll struggle with in the future. I have a reputation for wanting things to be *just right,* and have a hard time delegating things to other people - even wise, competent adults! :D

I remember my mom always trying to involve us in what she was doing. She always says now that things would have been a whole lot easier for her to do them herself, but then again, we wouldn't have learned nearly as much, or be ready to help with things around the house at nearly as young an age!

Lauren Z

Katie said...

I have been thinking about little victories a lot as I have been tired and sick and had time to stop and think about life!! There are many areas that I often rush through because I am just ready to be done, like bed times, school work, and involving the kids in what I am doing. I have been working on making a specific effort to slow down and enjoy the areas I often rush through with the kids. So bed time here I come:-)